In Ohio - Parental Interference in Your Relationship Goes Beyond Just You and Your Child.

“I know you don’t want to go see Grammy and Grandpa this weekend.” “We are going to go to have fun while you are with Grammy and Grandpa and I’m so sorry you won’t get to go.”

“As soon as you are older, you can tell the judge how much you don’t want to see Grammy and Grandpa and you won’t have to go over there anymore.”

The above are examples of common forms of parental alienation. Most frequently used in divorce, these techniques can also be used to alienate grandchildren against their grandparents when the parent and grandparents do not get along.

It is most frequently the mother who engages in this kind of behavior but fathers have also been known to do it, if not at the rate of frequency of their female counterparts). Since both sides engage in this practice, I will refer to the alienating parent as “the alienator” through the rest of this article.

Other examples of alienating behavior include the following kind of statements when the child speaks with the alienator by phone while visiting his/her other family:

“Your pet misses you so much. He’s been whining and crying because he’s so sad that you aren’t here.”

“I miss you so much. I’m so sad that you aren’t here. I just cry and cry and cry every night while you’re away.”

“The house so so empty without you. I miss you and can’t wait for you to be back here.”

“You sound upset. Are you okay? Do you miss me? Do you? You really sound upset. Are you crying? Are you crying because you have to stay with Grammy and Grandpa instead of being here with me?”

You may notice, especially if you have been forced to go to court to secure rights of access and visitation to your grandchildren, that the child grows sad, quiet, or withdrawn after speaking with the alienator.

The child may also cry or be upset during exchanges. Children are incredibly sensitive to their caretaker’s wishes and, since their caretakers are those who provide , clothing, shelter, and love for the child, the child will, naturally, wish to please them and keep them happy. The alienator preys on this innocence and uses it to get the child to act out, crying, screaming, throwing tantrums, declaring hatred for the other party, etc, in order to confirm the alienator’s beliefs. The alienator cannot accept that the child can love and have a good time with people the alienator does not like so the alienator will frequently prompt the child to say that they are having a horrible time, that they are bored, that they hate being away from the alienator. The alienator will also prompt the child to cry.

Alienation is very subtle in some cases. In others, it can be quite blatant. You must be on the watch for it and be prepared to handle it with the child in an age-appropriate manner. First of all, you must realize that even if you think that the alienator is a complete waste of a perfectly good zygote, the child does not see it that way. The child loves his/her caretakers even if you don’t. Do not project your dislike of them onto the child’s relationship with them. Instead, speak positively about them and encourage the child’s relationship with them. Remember: this is the child’s relationship, not yours.

When the alienator engages in the above kinds of behavior, try to remind the child that the child does enjoy being with you, that the child does have a good time with you, and that you understand that the child misses the alienator.

Validate the child’s feelings. Help the child to express them. Help the child reality-test any claims made by the alienator (ex: “We do have fun over here. Remember last month when we went to FUNPLACE2 and you did FUNTHING?”) Then remind the child that these are adult problems and that the child should not be involved in them. Let the child know that the child can love both you and the alienator and that you will never, never make them choose between you.

As the child grows older, especially into the teen years, try to temper your understanding of the difference between alienation and normal teenage independence. While you should never make the child your confidant or speak about court proceedings with the child, it may be okay (I am not a parent so take this with a HUGE heaping of salt) to explain a little more — in an age-appropriate manner — about why you and the alienator do not get along. Still, remember to validate the child’s feelings, to help them express those feelings fittingly, and then to remind the child that the child can love both of you.

Remember that, no matter what, you should not seek to involve the child in an adult matter. Even teenagers do not have the life experience or emotional maturity to understand or deal with adult strife. Teenagers may think they do (I certainly did!) but they do not. No parent worth the name would allow their children to be dragged into a conflict between the parent and another adult. Indeed, a good parent and would forbid the child to even think about participating in the conflict. The adult arena is no place for a child — not even a teenaged child.

Credit:Grandparents Rights

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Ohio Courts Out Sourcing of Judicial Powers to Guardians ad ltiem

Our Courts are asking for trouble in letting Guardians ad litem and Parental Coordinators decide whether a child(ren) spend  more time with one parent over another. Parents should not be put into a position of having to prove whether or not they are fit. It is also an abuse of judicial power by the courts, Guardians ad litem and Parental Coordinators if you as a parent are in fear of losing you child(ren). Our Judges tolerate and are encouraged to outsource their role to Guardians ad litem and Parental Coordinators. These quasi-judicial officers will quite often force parents into expensive investigations and examinations. This is a violation to be free of governmental/ judicial obstruction in the private lives of citizens.

Ohio's Guardians ad litem and Parental Coordinators have been working with no oversight or accountability. There are quite a few in the state that have pushed the boundaries of their role to the point of abuse - Judicial Abuse, Guardian ad litem abuse and Parental Coordinator abuse. Your rights as a citizen as a parent in going through divorce are no less because of the circumstance of divorce. Yet time and again we have seen the basic rights that we often times take for granted - taken away or worse given away. The courts treat criminals with more respect and take great pains so as to not infringe on their basic rights. Yet divorcing parents are not given this same respect given to criminals.

You as a parent can do something about this. We encourage you to call your representative and tell them your story of Judicial Abuse. That our courts have failed us and to put oversight of Guardians ad litem and Parental Coordinators into the hands of this system is placing accountability in a branch of government that lost any respectable vision of what is right or wrong years ago. Our courts pander to the special interest that we have entrusted with protecting out children. Parents as a result suffer and pay for this.

Our Constitutional rights have and are being violated by court officers. This has been going on for years. It is time to take back what has been lost because it is in your child's best interest. Please contact us at NationalGALalert@ gmail.com or find us on Facebook for up to date dialogue on reforming the Guardian ad litem system in the state.

In Ohio Parental Rights being Routinely Violated by Guardians ad litem

Are divorcing parents being discriminated against by Guardians ad litem and the courts? There have been and are cases in Ohio where there has been unwarranted removal of a child from one parent to another. In doing so the Guardian ad litem and by default the courts are preventing a parent from exercising their parental rights. These rights are protected substantively under the Constitution of the Untied states.

When a Guardian ad litem makes this kind of recommendation to the courts and the courts enforces this recommendation (as we have seen time and again) - placing a child under primary control of one parent. It is being done so through the use of unchecked and unsubstantiated use of the state's power. This is discriminatory and prevents a parent from passing on his/ her beliefs to their child(ren).



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Please contact us at NatinoalGALalert@gmail.com for information on Guardians ad litem or find us on Facebook for up to date information and ideas.

Canada Recognizes Problems with Family Courts - Will Ohio?

Ohio is not the only area where there are very real issues surrounding the family court system. In Canada – where there has been ongoing problems within their family court system – the Supreme Court of Canada has ruled that an overhaul of the system needs to take place. That the family courts have operated in a dysfunctional way for decades much as they have here in much of Ohio. In Ohio though there is often a resistance to any kind of much needed reform from our courts and the divorce industry – this is one of the reasons why in several states there is a push for reform of the broken Guardian ad litem system.

Presented below is some of the article from the Globe and Mail:

Report to Supreme Court chief justice calls for family law overhaul

An unreleased report commissioned by the country’s top judge is urging a radical overhaul of Canada’s family law system.

The report to Chief Justice Beverley McLachlin, scheduled for release next month, calls for restructuring the family law system from the ground up, with a focus on streamlining the court process and ending a fixation on combat.

The report, from a committee headed by Supreme Court Justice Thomas Cromwell, goes on to make more than two dozen recommendations, including the creation of specialized judges who can shepherd a family law dispute from beginning to end.

The family law system has been under attack for much of the past two or three decades over litigation that drags out and the destructive effect of the adversarial process on couples who are vulnerable and prone to go on the attack. And the inordinate costs of litigation have led to a massive increase in the number of litigants who represent themselves – now as much as 70 or 80 per cent.

A copy of the report, obtained by The Globe and Mail, says that estranged spouses and their children are seriously damaged by the adversarial system; and that judges, lawyers and law schools must embrace a culture of mediation and settlement.

The ground-breaking report also recommends the imposition of painful cost awards against litigants who behave badly or impede settlements.

Full story: Globe and Mail

Additional material on family law as presented by the Globe and Mail: SupremeCourt Leadership

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Guardians ad litem are wonderful according to Deputy Chief Judge Robert E. Mullen

Maybe the Hon. Robert E. Mullen, Deputy Chief Judge who gave a presentation along with Judge Susan Longley at the recent meeting of the Joint Standing  Committee of the Judiciary missed what has been going on this past year. If they are to be believed Guardians ad litem are wonderful and the noise currently being made by concerned citizens is limited to a handful of people. According to them.

A year ago there were only 5 people in the state that voiced concern about Guardians ad litem that we were aware of. A year later we know of almost 400 people who have been touched in a negative way by a Guardian ad litem. These are people from all parts of the state. They are children, parents, grandparents, friends and co-workers who have all experienced the pain that results from a Guardian ad litem that is under managed and with no oversight. One has to ask where Deputy Chief Judge Robert E. Mullen and Judge Susan Longley are getting their information? Are their opinions based in any kind of reality or fact? Or is it based on the bubblegum reality that the divorce industry paints for their constituents – the courts and those representatives that have a vested interest in perpetuating the money machine known as Guardian ad litem?

On January 31, 2013 The Deputy Chief Judge gave a presentation that covered much of what the Judiciary and those in the Divorce industry have told us before in the past. That there is a process for complaints. That there are rules and standards the courts and Guardians ad litem live by.  While all of this looks good to those of us looking in from the outside –  the reality of those on the inside is not as good or clear. For instance there is no process that explains what a lay person needs to do to file a complaint. The Rules and Standards which are displayed for everyone to see are meaningless words to be used at the courts convenience. There is no informed consent – so that parents know how the information they are about to give to a Guardian ad litem and courts can be used against them. How their Constitutional rights may be violated. These are just a few of the issues that the divorce industry have ignored or are blaming on the parents and families caught up in the process.

“Guardians ad litem are wonderful" according to  Deputy Chief Judge Robert E. Mullen but there is mounting evidence to show there are very real problems. The Judiciary has known since 2006 of problems with its rostered GALs and the lack of oversight and management of these court officers.  Some of the issues are listed here:

1. 2006 OPEGA report that highlighted 11 areas that need reform or correction
2. 2008 report by Maine's Judiciary that pointed out areas of concern
3. The National organization First Start which has rated Maine with a ( F ) for three reports 
4. The National organization Center for Judicial Excellence which pointed out problems with Maine 
5. In less than ( 1 ) year over 400 people have come out to question the actions of Guardians ad litem in a custody dispute.
6. In less than ( 1 ) year over 60 consumer complaints about GALs that are rostered in Maine.
7. Chief Justice Saufley who spoke in March of 2012 and who pointed out some of the horrors that divorcing families have had to experience at the hands of Guardians ad litem – sexual abuse, questionable billing practices, predatory practice, lack of management and lack of oversight to name a few of the items from the list she presented.
8. 2012 May 31 in Portland at the court house there were numerous consumer concerns about the role of Guardian ad litem – with follow up letters to the Judiciary
9. For this legislative session ( 5 ) bills dealing with some aspect of Guardian ad litem reform have been presented.

One has to ask Deputy Chief Judge Robert E. Mullen and Judge Susan Longley if the situation with Guardians ad litem are really “peaches and cream” then where is the proof – that is proof other than the shop worn 'statistic' of two Guardians ad litem in five years having been disciplined. Currently divorcing families have a loaded weapon pointed at them if a Guardian ad litem is brought onto the case. With no limitations, controls and immunity Guardians ad litem will leave a path of destruction in their wake. All of this is done with the blessing of the courts and 'in the best interest of the child'. It is time to bring about reform so that future families are not crippled.

If you have or had an issue with a Guardian ad litem please contact us at NationalGALalert@gmail.com. Like us on Facebook or find us on twitter.

No Job description - No Foundation - No Accountability for GALs

The “Judiciary” has created a class of person that has no job description and these people work as court officers with no accountability, management or direction. They make life altering decisions and often play God with your life and that of your child. If they make a mistake – the courts say they are protected by “quasi” immunity and for all purposes - untouchable. 

They are Guardians ad litem (GAL) and Parental Coordinators (PC).

With no job description it is impossible to say what a PC or GAL is supposed to do and if they are doing something they should not. Mission creep has set in so that now a GAL or PC can 'recommend' therapy and do so with no reason, end point or methodology. All of this from just 16 hours of training.  You resist and the courts will coerce you into taking this therapy under threat of jail time or loss of custody. Or a GAL or PC may not report neglect or abuse when common sense dictates that they should report to DHHS. With no job description – you – as a parent have no recourse on this persons job performance – how do you prove they are wrong? You can't. As a result any complaint against a GAL or PC will go nowhere. That is why in five years not one GAL or PC has been removed or reprimanded in the course of doing their 'job' when a consumer has lodged a complaint. This despite mounting evidence that would suggest otherwise – that job performance is lacking.

A job description is a foundation upon which a job can be built upon. No foundation or one that is not solid and the structure of that job will be weak and rotten (like what we have currently). We urge those in state government to look at creating a job description for Guardians ad litem and Parental Coordinators. This is a no cost method of providing oversight and accountability to a 'profession' that has none. Let our representatives know how you have been affected by this lack of a job description – write, call or email them with your story. Or email MeGALalert@gmail.com and we will forward your story on to those who should be concerned.

In Ohio - Judges Routinely Violate 5th Amendment Rights of Citizens

“Nor shall be compelled in any criminal case be a witness against himself” These are one of the the lofty, important human rights guaranteed to all US citizens by our world famous Constitution. Yet in state after state these 5th Amendment citizen rights are being violated by family courts, the very institutions that are supposed to protect those rights. This has been going on unnoticed by many for some time and has almost become accepted as a regular way of doing business by the courts, Judges, lawyers, officers of the courts and uninformed consumers.

What Judges are condoning- whether directly or indirectly - is asking one or both people involved in a custody to sign over their rights to privacy in confidential, privileged transactions, without explaining how this confidential information will be used- for or against the party. In the example provided below, the judge has ordered the defendant to provide proof of not only the attendance of counseling, but to allow the counselor to speak with the Plaintiff on the Defendants progress.

Click on image for expanded view

Why is this a violation of the defendants 5th Amendment rights? There may be those who will say that the defendant has a choice. He/ she does not have to agree to follow the judge’s order. And this, in theory, would be true. In this case, however, the defendant was faced with the following:

1. He/ She was threatened with contempt of court and jail if he/ she did not comply

2. He/ She could agree with the release of information to his/ her ex and the courts without knowing how his therapy records might be used by the opposing attorney and the alienated spouse: in his favor, or against him, to argue that he/she was an unfit parent, should not have time with his/her child. He is being asked to risk testifying against himself, if his therapy records are released. Self-incrimination versus contempt of court and jail. Tough choices!

Although both choices are horrible and personally damaging, What would you do? In going to jail there is the potential of losing one’s job, having a jail record and the loss of income during jail time. These are all tangible concerns and fears. We know what the potential consequences are in going to jail.

On the other hand by agreeing to the release of information, the "owner" of the information has no way of knowing in advance how that information is going to be used. It is impossible to give his/her “informed consent”, because it is impossible to know every possible or likely outcome of this action, and how it may affect your case. There is also no way to know that the information gained by the plaintiff and court will not be used as part of an attack by the plaintiff against the defendant. This is seen by many people as a sneaky, indirect way to get the defendant to testify against him/ herself. It is a violation of the defendants 5th Amendment rights, and it is all too frequently used by Judges that preside over family courts in custody disputes. It is also one of the many examples of how the Judicial process in family cases has corrupted itself. This process is in danger of becoming very ingrained in the system and it violates the constitutional 5th Amendment rights - to say nothing of common law principles about forcing consent.

The courts in the state are showing a lack of respect for the privileged, confidential information that is conveyed between the therapist and patient as an absolutely necessary part of therapy. In this case (as well as many others that we are aware of) under the threat of contempt of court, the defendant buckled and was forced into making a “release of information” decision that had ramifications that the Judge, plaintiff and most of all defendant had no way of knowing how it would play out. The Judge was in effect telling the defendant that he/ she would have to potentially testify against him/ her self – thus violating their rights under the constitution. The judge also unwittingly destroyed therapy by destroying the confidentiality necessary to make therapy work!

If you have had issues or if things about your case just don't seem right with your Guardian ad litem – please contact us for support at NationalGALalert@gmail.com or like us on Facebook to stay up to date on issues and events. We encourage your thoughts on this subject please feel free to respond.