Questions You Should Be Asking Your GAL

Our court system has us believe that the role of Guardian ad litem is at least in theory a person who is the eyes and ears of the court offering a neutral and unbiased view of the divorcing family. In practice the person who operates in this role is anything but. The Guardian ad litem’s personal values and agenda clouds the process and as a result this can be a source of conflict with you.

Ask yourself this:

How well do you know this person?

What happens if your values differ from that of this court appointed official?

Our Family Court system markets the belief that in the roll of Guardian ad litem we have a person who we are to believe is an expert in determining – where your child should live, the impact of divorce or domestic violence, visitation, custody, law, psychology and social work to name a few areas. This expertise comes from just a few hours of training with little or no focus. There is no test to determine whether or not this Guardian ad litem understands the material. There is no mentoring program after the Guardian ad litem completes training. To make matters worse - there is no oversight or management of this person in this role. Doctors, lawyers, judges, electricians, plumbers, nurses, oil burner technicians, chiropractors, social workers and dental hygienists have more training and oversight. In addition to the training and oversight we can ask people in these professions questions without the fear of being reprimanded for doing so.

You – as a consumer – need to inform yourself about the person who is being thrust into your life and making decisions which you have no control over. They should be asked before any Guardian ad litem has become a part of your life - chances are the Guardian ad litem is already wreaking havoc in your divorce/ custody. It is not too late.

These questions are being presented in no particular order or grouping. In most cases the answers will have meaning for you and should be used as a tool to help in understanding the Guardian ad litem. In asking any of these questions if the Guardian ad litem refuses to answer or gives a non-answer answer – that is a behavioral message and a clue as to the makeup of the person. The questions and answers should be entered in as evidence or asked in court of the Guardian ad litem. It becomes part of the record.

After going through this list if you can think of questions that may be appropriate to ask we would encourage you to share. A link will be provided to voice those questions.

Presented here are some basic questions (depending on the answer there may be follow up questions):

1. Do you have experience as a law enforcement officer in conducting investigations?
2. What is your actual field of professional expertise?
3. What makes you an expert in determining what is good for other people’s children?
4. What makes you an expert in determining how other people should conduct their lives?
5. What is your child hood family background?
6. What is your own family history as an adult?
7. What is your own marital history as an adult?
8. What is your own relationship history as an adult?
9. Why do you want to be appointed to this case?
10. What do you see your role in this case to be?
11. How do you separate your underlying professional behaviors from your role as Guardian ad litem functions?
12. As a Guardian ad litem going through training were you ever tested on what you learned?

     a. YES – What was the score you received?
     b. NO – How do we know that you understand the material taught/ discussed?

13. As a Guardian ad litem you are tasked as being neutral and unbiased in conducting your investigation and in making recommendations.

     a. How do you maintain neutrality during your investigation?
     b. How do you keep your personal bias and agenda out of the cases?
     c. Does the judge provide supervision and oversight when you are appointed to a case?

14. As a child did you ever experience issues involving the absence of one or both parents?

     a. YES – What was that experience like for you?
     b. NO – How can you understand what the issues are?

15. Do you have experience with research in dealing with child custody?

     a.  YES - What specific research can you sight?
     b.  NO – If not then please explain how you are able to conduct an investigation?

16. Please describe what was/ is the relationship you had/ have with your Mother?
17. Please describe what was/ is the relationship you had/ have with your Father?
18. Are there any ongoing issues with either?
19. Did you grow up in a divorced home?
20. Do you have siblings?
21. Do you have Grandparents?
22. As a child did you have contact with your extended family?
23. Do you come from a religious home?

     a.  YES – What is your religion currently?

24. Did/ do you come from a particular ethnic background?
25. We grow up with a belief system. It is a part of what defines us as a person.

     a.  Has your belief system ever interfered with an investigation?
     b.  Did/ will your belief system interfere with this case?
     c.  NO – How do we know?

26. Do you apply your own values in making recommendations to the court?

     a.  YES – Can you describe what some of your personal values (political, social as example).
            i.  If my values are different than yours how will that affect your perception of me as parent?

     b.  YES – As a neutral observer – why are your values better than either parent?
     c.  NO – How can we be sure?
     d.  NO – As a neutral observer – are you saying that your investigation is neutral with regards to the values you have?

             i.   If so then what test do you use to verify this?
             ii.  How can we be sure your values will not influence how you view this divorce/ custody?

27. In making your recommendations to this court please explain how you arrived at the following:

      a.  The visitation schedule?
      b.  Custody?

28. Have you ever been married?

      a.  YES – How many times?
      b.  NO – How are you able to understand the dynamics of married life?

29. Have you ever been divorced?

      a.  YES – How many times?
      b.  YES – Did you ever go through litigation?
              i.   YES – Did you have issues with child support?
              ii.  YES – Did you have issues with the custody agreement(s)?
      c.  NO – What experience do you draw upon in order to understand what a divorcing family goes through?

30. Do you ever refer cases you are involved in to Child Protective services?

      a.  YES – What are your criteria for such a referral?
      b.  YES – Is the claim of child abuse always a criminal claim?
      c.  YES – Should criminal allegations be removed from Family Court to an investigation by the Attorney General’s Office?

31. Which Judges do you frequently work with?
32. Which lawyers do you work with on cases?
33. How many of your cases have been appealed to a higher court?
34. Have you ever been sanctioned:

      a.  By a Judge?
      b.  By a Higher Court?
      c.  The result of a complaint?

35. How many cases have you been involved with as a Guardian ad litem?
36. How do your clients respond to the work you do as a Guardian ad litem?

While these questions should be asked before the Guardian ad litem has been assigned by the judge - quite often it will not be until after you recognize there is a problem with the way this person operates. It is never to late to start asking. Make the questions and answers for the record. If you have any questions which you think may be appropriate we ask that you follow this [LINK] to submit. We will maintain a running list of questions.

NaGAL is working for reform in our Family Court system. This includes the role of Guardian ad litem (court vendor), Parent Coordinator, Special Master and court evaluators. If you have issues we ask that you contact us at NationalGALalert@gmail.com or find us on Facebook.


Felicity Myers

You're A Mean One Mr GAL

You're a mean one, Mr. GAL.
You really are a heel.
You're as cuddly as a court room,
You're as charming as a court appeal,
Mr. GAL.
You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel.

You're a monster, Mr. GAL.
Your heart's an empty soul.
Your brain is full of nonsense.
You've got garlic in your brain, Mr GAL.
I wouldn't touch you with a
Thirty-nine and a half foot pole.

You can imagine how the rest of the song goes.


Unless you have a record of abuse - physical and or mental - there is little reason for a Guardian ad litem to make a "recommendation" to the court that you should not spend time with your child(ren). Guardians ad litem do not have the training that a psychologist would have ( as example ) in determining whether a child will be harmed or whether you should see your child. Unfortunately Guardians ad litem will use their position in the courts to influence a judge.

You are not alone in thinking that what you are experiencing is unfair and unjust. It is. You have to have strength to overcome this injustice. It will also take time to document in writing and other media what is going on. You have to look at what you are experiencing in the long term and realize that it will probably take time. Be patient.

NaGAL works to educate the public and our elected officials on the issues within the Family Court system. We concentrate on the court vendors - Guardians ad litem - as they bring little value compared to their expense to the table. If you have had issues with a Guardian ad litem we encourage you to contact your state representatives and find us on Facebook.

Is Junk Science used in Family Courts?

Junk Science -

is the name given to popular, unscientific concepts, consultants and practices used in some courts to defend and justify actions and decisions that might be hard to justify otherwise.

Commonly there is no form of testing to prove or disprove an idea or recommendation that a Guardian ad litem or Family Court is promoting.

Junk science by its ungrounded, unscientific foundation potentially corrupts the judicial process, and it is the source of much human pain and disillusionment, when it is used.  It significantly undermines public confidence in the intelligence and fairness of the judiciary and the courts.

When Guardians ad litem and lawyers make far reaching pronouncements about a child or a party with whom they have had little interaction and offer speculative opinions for which they have no scientific basis, this is "junk science".  When they project into the future (no one can foretell the future), this is pure junk science, when they label parties and/or their children with catchy syndromes that are unrecognized by leading national professional organizations in the field, this is junk science.  When they recommend or prescribe trendy treatments or counseling that have no recognized  scientific basis, this is prescribing "junk science".  When some courts force unwanted treatment or demand the release of privileged, personal therapy records in non-criminal divorce cases- using the threat of contempt- this can only be labeled as practicing  “junk science”.  It is totalitarian and it is destructive of human worth, dignity and human rights.  It ill becomes a democratic society.  When some courts duplicate and/or override the findings of Children's Protective agencies or highly qualified professional consultants, this is junk practice.

Junk science is an area of court usage that needs careful, undefensive review, data collection and high level behavioral medicine consultation to develop the best standards if courts are to correct a bad practice

NaGAL work to bring about change in the Family Court system. We would encourage you to become involved by talking to your state representative. Please find us on Facebook. 

felicity myers

My Lost Love, My Lost Child - A Poem

A divorcing family is hard for everyone especially the child(ren). The following poem by Garrett W. Wheeler - My Lost Love, My Lost Child is a cry out for a child by a father. The poem could pertain to anyone - mother, father or the grandparent who doesn't get to see that child anymore...


My Lost Love, My Lost Child
I wonder what you’re doing
and how you’re living life
what new things did you learn today
and how did you sleep last night
did you feel raindrops on your face
or sunshine in your eyes
of all the questions left unknown
the biggest one is why
why can’t we be together
why can’t I watch you grow
why can’t I guide you through this world
this I just don’t know
but I promise we’ll be together
no matter how long it seems
just know your always in my heart
and always in my dreams


poem written by © Garrett W. Wheeler

NaGAL offers support to those parents who have little to no contact with their child(ren).

Remember Our Veterans

This weekend as we honor those who fought to help maintain the freedoms you and I have.


Remember that many veterans have returned from deployment only to be thrown into conflict for which they were ill prepared. Fighting in the arena of Family Court.

These veterans find them selves fighting a foreign war where their children are taken away from them. Their rights abused and ignored and they are left broken physically and in spirit - destitute and homeless.


Family Courts operate in an opaque environment - you can take the step to make it transparent. Become involved for the benefit of a veteran as well as yours. Call your state representatives and write to them about the problems and issues in Family Courts. Help a veteran - help yourself.

Does the Bar encourage false claims of Parental Neglect?

Several years ago the Family Section of the American Bar did a study that covered the issue of programmed and brainwashed children.

It was "discovered" that of those cases the Bar looked at - none - had any merit for litigation this despite claims of:

Abuse; parental neglect; alcohol and or drug use/ addiction and poor social and or physical environment - to name a few of many issues.

The Bar discovered that it was the emotional and social needs of the programmer/ brainwasher that brought about the aggressive conflict with the target parent.

Family Court has known about the issues you have been experiencing for decades - but has done nothing to minimize or prevent what you experienced.


NaGAL helps parents and others understand what is going on in our failed Family Court system. We would encourage you to let others know your story of being falsely accused. Become involved.

American Bar Discovers Parents Are Being Alienated from their Children

During your divorce and after did you feel that your children were being alienated from your life? Brainwashed or even programmed?

Did anyone listen to what you had to say or were you told that you were just "sour grapes"

Well you should know that several years ago the "Family" Section of the American Bar did a study that concentrated on children being brainwashed, programmed and alienated from the target parent.

For instance the American Bar found that the parent who was actively brainwashing often rationalized what they were doing - and doing so "in the best interest of the child". Often claiming that they were the parent telling the truth.

The brainwashing parent used what ever means available to punish the target parent - often using the former couples children to deliver the message.

In over 20% of the cases studied religion was used to label the target parent as being "bad".

The Bar discovered that the programmers thinking was irrational.

The list goes on and as the targeted parent you could probably add to what was discovered by the American Bar. Yet the Bar has done little to shed light on the problems associated with one parent alienating another. This despite knowing how to detect and manage the problem in the court system.

One thing that you should do as the targeted parent is document every instance that alienation happens. Keep a journal, get a voice recorder and record what is happening to you. Otherwise it is your word against the brainwasher.
 
NationalGAL is for "Family" Court and Guardian ad litem reform. We do so by educating parents on how to protect them selves in "Family" Court. Please find us on Facebook or email us at NationalGALalert@gmail.com

Has Your Child Been Brainwashed or Programmed?

If you as a parent feel that your child(ren) is being programed or brainwashed by the other parent you are not alone.

In a study by the American Bar Association (ABA) Family Section some surprising facts came about.

• Accusations made by the brainwasher/ programmer (Alienator) were never followed up upon by Guardians ad litem (court vendors), lawyers or others who were party to the case. Many Guardians ad litem - for instance - claimed that it was almost impossible to detect.
• In the majority of cases - there was no history of abuse, drug or alcohol abuse or that the child(ren) lived in an environment that was poor and sickly. Yet when these types of accusations were made against the alienated parent they were rarely if ever followed up upon.
• If you as the target parent of the alienation had moved on - career, new house or marriage - it was shown that the brainwashing/ programming only intensified against that parent.

 How did the children fare?

• In interviews with the children - 80% - of them wanted the alienating process discovered.
• That - 70% - felt some kind of relief when the alienating process was discovered.
• It was discovered that many of the children would say what the alienator wanted - especially when that person was present. When in the presence of the other parent they would often display love and affection towards that parent.
• Simple but specialized interviewing techniques would uncover this alienating behavior in the alienating parent.

As a parent it is hard to bear hearing some of the things that our child(ren) may say to us as a result of the brainwashing/ programming they are going through. You have to understand that your child is probably struggling and may feel powerless to do anything for fear of punishment. Talk to your child and ask if there was anything that may have upset or cause concern during your visit with them. Do this before they are brought back. If there is address it with them and if it becomes a problem later on with the other parent you can let them know that you worked it out with your child(ren).

Family Courts have known for years about alienating parents and the brainwashing/ programming that happens. Yet they have either chosen to do nothing or are ill equipped to do anything about it.

MeGAL provides support and education on the issues within the Family Court system. If you have or are experiencing problems please contact us at MeGALalert@gmail.com or find us on Facebook.

The Programming and Brainwashing of Children by Another Parent

The American Bar Section of Family Law did a twelve year study on the issue of programming and brainwashing of children by a parent.

Some of the findings:

Those who were/ are a part of the case - Lawyers, Judges and other court vendors often knew of the problem but would do little or nothing because of the process involved with proving it.

Many Guardians ad litem (GALs) (court vendor) and mental health professionals were (and still are) ill equipped to recognize that programming and or brainwashing was occurring.

If you feel that brainwashing has been going on or that your child(ren) are being programmed - you are probably not alone in knowing that. There is a good change that the courts and their vendors also know - but choose to do nothing about it.

The courts choose to ignore.

 

Examined - A Parents Right to Free Speech

While this appeal does not center around a Guardian ad litem that has failed. It could have.

 In an unusual case the Tennessee Court of Appeals indicated that some of the restrictions placed on the Mother regarding communications were vague or broad.

As an example the Mother was restricted from mentioning the Father at all on social media. This meant that the most benign reference would land the Mother in trouble.

What is even more interesting is that this was a Family Matters case and the Mother was Pro se.

For more details please follow these links:

Herston Law Group - Parent’s Right to Free Speech Examined in Nashville, TN Child Custody Modification: Gider v. Hubbell

Court of Appeals - SINAN GIDER v. LYDIA HUBBELL